Fat Man's Misery, Zion

Nick

-
.
Joined
Aug 9, 2007
Messages
12,949
I had a incredible three day weekend of canyoneering in Zion National Park in mid-September. We kicked it off with a trip through Misery Canyon, more commonly known as Fat Man's Misery. Contrary to what one might think, a larger than average man such as myself can get through the canyon in a somewhat less than miserable state. The canyon got its name from a now-eroded feature that you used to have to squeeze down through, but the name lives on thanks to the extraordinarily long approach and exit hike. Here is a map with my GPS tracks:


View larger map.
We knew this hike had potential to be a 12+ hour day so we started bright and early. Well, not so bright actually. We started before it was even light out. This photo was shot at f3.5, IS0 3200 and 1/5 second. It was DARK!
fat-mans-misery-zion-1.jpg

The first mile or two is spent climbing a steep canyon with plenty of little things to climb over and around. Eventually it tops out at a pass where we caught our first glimpse of the terrain we were heading into. That's the East Fork of the Virgin River down there, aka Parunaweap, aka The Barracks.
fat-mans-misery-zion-2.jpg

Looking back down the canyon we just climbed up. The highway through Zion's East Side is just down at the end of it. That's Checkerboard Mesa on the right.
fat-mans-misery-zion-3.jpg

fat-mans-misery-zion-4.jpg

Amazing views and light down into the East Fork.
fat-mans-misery-zion-5.jpg

Just before dropping into Misery Canyon, we crested a high slickrock ridge. The colors and patterns were outstanding, as was the light.
fat-mans-misery-zion-6.jpg

After a steep slickrock descent, we found ourselves at the floor of Misery Canyon and soon after, at the first rappel into an amazingly beautiful section of fluted narrows.
fat-mans-misery-zion-7.jpg

fat-mans-misery-zion-8.jpg

fat-mans-misery-zion-9.jpg

The narrows came in bursts... one good long stretch at a time, followed by some open wash, immediately followed by another great stretch of beautiful winding corridors.
fat-mans-misery-zion-10.jpg

fat-mans-misery-zion-11.jpg

We arrived at a drop with a sling fixed to the wall. The idea here is to swing out onto the ledge on the right and then lower yourself down into the pool.
fat-mans-misery-zion-12.jpg

But what you don't see until you are on the ledge, is that you are in the incredible 'arch room' of Misery Canyon. In reality, there are several arch rooms in the canyon including one with two arches that is so deep in the canyon it is nearly pitch black, but this one definitely had the best light. That's Bill down there flipping me off, as usual.
fat-mans-misery-zion-13.jpg

neiloro just realized where he is.
fat-mans-misery-zion-14.jpg

lostlandscapes taking it all in.
fat-mans-misery-zion-16.jpg

There is a short rap just after the arch room, then a break and then more good stuff.
fat-mans-misery-zion-17.jpg

I bagged up my big camera for a while at this point so I suppose it's about time I break out the video footage from this canyon.

A few shots from a dry section of slot below the confluence of the East Fork.
fat-mans-misery-zion-18.jpg

fat-mans-misery-zion-19.jpg

And then the camera went back in the dry bag and stayed there for a while. The lower section of the canyon was wet with springs and flowing water pouring into the canyon. It was absolutely amazing. If you didn't watch the video above, check it out.

We topped off our water reserves at a spring before heading down stream through the Barracks to find our exit canyon. We only had about a 1/2 mile to hike on the East Fork but it was a glorious half mile.
fat-mans-misery-zion-20.jpg

fat-mans-misery-zion-21.jpg

fat-mans-misery-zion-23.jpg

The exit route was easy to find but not quite as easy to climb. There were a few sections of rather spicy fourth class climbing. If the slickrock hadn't been to course and full of foot and handholds, this would have been impossible.
fat-mans-misery-zion-24.jpg

Hiking back along the rim of Misery Canyon.
fat-mans-misery-zion-25.jpg

After reconnecting with our path from early that morning, we took one last break in the shade before pushing for the truck. After sitting there for 10 minutes or so, I looked over and realized we had rested right next to a near mirror image of the Backcountrypost logo.
fat-mans-misery-zion-26.jpg

The hike out was indeed brutal. A lot of elevation gain, something like 1500 feet I think. Combined with many miles in the hot, exposed sun. There's a good reason they call it Fat Man's Misery. We had reasonable temperatures and it was still a burner. I would never dream of doing this hike in the summer. To give you an idea, my GPS read 4.8 miles by the time we reached the floor of Misery in the morning. That means this is something like a 14+ mile day, much of which spent climbing back out. But despite all that, Misery is bliss.

Featured image for home page:
slide.jpg
 
The Vimeo version of my video appears to be having issues loading, if it isn't working for you, check out the YouTube version below. I just allowed them to add the stabilization feature so we'll see how that turns out soon. Regardless, it's much better if you click the little gear icon and switch it to HD.
[parsehtml]
<iframe width="853" height="480" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/CUbzbK_C5BQ" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe><br><br>
[/parsehtml]
Or the non-shake-reduced version:
 
Awesome video. I've wanted to visit Parunuweap for quite awhile but that shot of the exit climb looks dicey. Also, lacking the rappelling know-how means a much longer (likely two-day) trip. Seems like Fat Man's is the best way in for those with the experience.
 
I like that you went back down that little water fall twice :). Awesome video. Jealous. I'm dieing to get out.
 
Thanks everyone.

ashergrey, the sketchy climb in/out could be better with a hand line although I guess someone still has to lead it out. Not too bad though. Cody and Don did Fat Man's as an overnighter last year(?), they actually brought their overnight packs all the way through the tech slot. Sounds like my kind of trip! As a whole though, Fat Man's is a very easy technical canyon. If you ever decide to pickup some rope skills, it would be a good beginner route with the biggest rap only being about 40 feet.
 
Very nice Nick! Love that video! What an amazing place.
 
Great TR. Love the pics and the video.

I also love the Barracks -- my only regret is that I wasn't able to get up into some of FMM from the bottom. I couldn't get past the first waterfall when I was there -- too slipery. I didn't have too much patience at the time as I'd just taken a stick to the eye.

That second-to-last shot with the pines is exactly where I camped when I was there!
barracks.jpg

Good stuff.

- Jamal
 
Super cool! All these canyoneering reports make me want to grow a pair and learn how to play with ropes.:D

Come play! You don't need a pair to learn to play with ropes.

Nice report and video Nick.

I would like a redo of Fat Man's. First time was good but I took Spencer (two years ago and his first canyon) and I really thought I would be leaving him behind on that hike out.
 
Well since I'm not the only one who's expressed an interest, where does one begin? Did you start with a canyoneering course, or did a friend show you the ropes (pun intended)?

Actually Don and Cody showed me how to rappel up in American Fork Canyon. I think that was 4 years ago. They did a great job! I wanted to know how before I did The Subway. Once in there I was hooked!!

It wasn't until I did the next two canyons (Keyhole and Pine Creek) that I decided I had better take a class. Kinda scary if you don't know what you are doing. There is so much more to canyoneering then just rappelling. I did do a few more canyons before taking a course the first part of this spring but I always made sure to go with more experienced and helpful canyoneers.

At this point I probably know about a fraction of what I should to be in these canyons. It is a very hands on learning experience.... at least for me. You can explain something in theory all you want to me but I don't connect it until I see it, feel it, do it. I feel pretty good rappelling but really weak on rigging. I need to do a canyon with someone that will let me set up every rap, basically let me do it all and they just stand there twiddling their thumbs until they see that I need to be corrected.

I took a three day course through ACA. Great class however if I could do it over again I would have taken the class but then made sure I had several canyon trips set up for the next couple weeks right after the class so I could put to practice everything I learned and cement it in my head.
 
Thanks! That was helpful. I find hands on learning to be the best way to pick up new skills, too. I would definitely need to start small because I'm afraid of heights. I try to step outside my comfort zone on a fairly regular basis in an attempt to overcome it, but I find that starting small and working my way up is the best way to build confidence. I'll have to look into taking a course, and make sure that when I do get to that point, that I can have a couple trips lined up to put what I learned to use.
 
Lisa, I am in the same boat about the rope skills. I tend to love route finding so much that i have up to this point ignored anything technical, but all of these reports are making me hungry.
blueeyes - i appreciate your input as to how you started to learn. i simply need to find a few people around here (and i am positive there are some) that will take the time to teach me - plus i have a playground to practice in literally right outside my door.

also.... looking at forum total post numbers, it looks like this is trip report #500 (or at least thread 500 in the trip reports section). i think nick deserves to celebrate somehow.
 
also.... looking at forum total post numbers, it looks like this is trip report #500 (or at least thread 500 in the trip reports section). i think nick deserves to celebrate somehow.

Sweeeeet!!! 500 trip reports!?!? So glad you pointed that out. You know what I think is really awesome though? There are more quality trip reports on BCP than any other category of discussion, by more than double! Less static, more quality. :D

Screen Shot 2012-09-24 at 7.49.09 PM.png

:wavespin:
 
what a great report and awesome pictures. :twothumbs: It also want me want to learn all the skills from the scratch and do a trip like that one day.
All these canyons you can explore while rappelling down, it offers so many new perspectives and opportunities.
 
I was just thinking about how I need to backpack the entire East Fork (The Barracks) next year. I was checking out Joe's guide on it and go to thinking that with two people and a handline, you could actually go quite far UP Misery. You wouldn't see the golden arch room or the upper fluted section, but you would be able to experience a great deal, I might even say most of the 'goods'. The lower water section with the grotto and double arch and the section above that with the amazing fluting.

Anwyay, just thought I'd mention that to anyone that might have it on their radar but don't want to/can't do the technical route. There would just be a handful of little sections that you might need some assistance from a partner to get the first person up, then they would be easily handlined for anyone else in the group. It's getting me stoked to get out there and backpack it now, not to mention all the other cool slot explorations in Joe's guide.
 
Similar threads
Thread starter Title Forum Replies Date
Ross Anyone want to do East Fork Fat Man's Misery-Barracks-Labyrinth Falls Oct 15 (tues) Trip Planning 0
Tyler Fat Man's Misery teammates needed next weekend Meet Up (Members Only) 0
Howells Outdoors Fat Man's Misery - 4/6/2013 Canyoneering 12
Howells Outdoors Fat Man's Misery (5.2012) Canyoneering 2
lostlandscapes Fat Man's Misery -- 9/14/12 Canyoneering 6
ram Fat Man's Joy 12-25-18 Canyoneering 4
McKee80 Shenandoah - Old Fat Guy in a Swimming Hole Backpacking 6
Ross Invite Boundary/Kolob/Narrows & East Fork Fat Man’s/Labyrinth Falls (Oct) Meet Up (Members Only) 4
Bob Fat Bike / Snowshoe Race Volunteering General Discussion 2
hatchcanyon The Sphinx (aka Fat Mama) Photography 0
Bill Fat Mans Misery 5.2013 Canyoneering 3
Bill Fat Mans Misery 9.2012 Canyoneering 4
Nick Fat Foot General Discussion 29
The Trout Whisperer A wise man just asked about my cuisine in th backcountry… General Discussion 41
Perry Holy Crap! Cougar Stalks Man on Local Trail General Discussion 14
Parma American man first to solo across Antarctica unaided General Discussion 21
Rockskipper Man wades into Katmai bear feeding zone, takes a selfie General Discussion 2
Perry Wow! Another Impressive Feat: Man Climbs Colorado's 100 Highest Peaks. Nonstop General Discussion 2
andyjaggy Missing Uinta Man Found General Discussion 0
Mike Jones Bivy or One Man Tent Gear 25
IntrepidXJ The Rain Man Site Hiking & Camping 2
westerner54 Government Trail to Big Man Pictographs, Grand Gulch Utah Backpacking 3
hatchcanyon Neanderthal Man - or so! Everything Else 4
gnwatts Stop THE MAN redux..... General Discussion 6
Duke My "Poor Man's L" Lens Photography 9
Nick Dog saves man, man eats dog General Discussion 6
gnwatts Fight the MAN! Labyrinth Canyon........ General Discussion 3
Howells Outdoors Mountain Man Captured General Discussion 4
IntrepidXJ Falling Man to Dante's View Hiking & Camping 4
Seldom Seen Anderson Little Man Site Everything Else 11
Archbishop Lazy man's trip report. Hiking & Camping 2
IntrepidXJ Big Man Panel & Lower Comb Wash Hiking & Camping 1
R Getting to All American Man Trip Planning 3
R Salt Creek - All American Man Trip Planning 28
Howells Outdoors Not Miserable in Misery Canyon Canyoneering 5
Ross Misery Canyon just east of Zion - west or east fork? Trip Planning 5
I Misery Canyon - next week (wetsuits?) Trip Planning 5
I Zion Trip Planning: Misery Canyon --> The Barracks --> West Rim Trip Planning 5
Nick Misery Canyoneering 19
Ross Invite Pine Creek, Misery Canyon or The Subway (Zion area) Meet Up (Members Only) 1
Ross Trip partners for south-west Utah (Pine Creek,Misery,Bull Valley etc) Trip Planning 0

Similar threads

Back
Top