What do you think is the best way to meet other SERIOUS backpackers when you only backpack once or twice a year and...

[kwc]

My wife has gone backpacking with me a few times. She gets nervous about it...enjoys it when it's beautiful, the weather is great, our packs aren't too heavy and the daily distances are within reason. I think she'd both love a trip into the Thorofare AND be worried about it...mostly bears. I'm tempted to talk her into it and just go for it. On the one hand she needs a nudge and she'd probably love it...on the other hand it would have to go without a hitch...she'll rely on me to get it right. What do you guys think about bringing reluctant on the fence spouses with you...if you figure they'll love it but they are nervous beforehand?

I mean, I know what I'm doing out there. Yeah I'd need bear "luck"! But I'd do all the proper precautions.

My biggest thing is I could use a pack shake down probably. And since I'm kinda responsible for her pack that would effect both packs. Thing is, things that people would suggest leaving my attitude would be, "What are you crazy?"

@forest dweller ... what are you to do if you get to Yellowstone with your wife and the weather isn’t “great”? I’m just curious.

 

[forest dweller]

@forest dweller ... what are you to do if you get to Yellowstone with your wife and the weather isn’t “great”? I’m just curious.

Well I don't think it will be atrocious in mid August. We'd adjust. Change plans. Work around it. Or, if it was supposed to be bad in the middle of a long trip let her know that there might be some rainy days. Keeping it real...what time of the month it is for her would have the greatest impact. Good thing I'm hoping to go out there for 2 weeks and it seems afternoon thunderstorms are more of a thing than constant rain.

 

[TheMountainRabbit]

What do you guys think about bringing reluctant on the fence spouses with you...if you figure they'll love it but they are nervous beforehand?

Mediocre idea, at best. I learned a long time ago that if I have to convince someone to join me, I'll probably have more fun by myself.

You can upgrade it to a full-on terrible idea by jumping straight into a week long, deep wilderness trip right off the bat.

Personally, my wife loves getting outdoors - she occasionally joins me for 2-3 day weekend trips or even 20+ mile day hikes - but she has zero interest in longer trips. I'm sure glad I let her figure that out at the tail end of a short trip, rather than the middle of a long one.

 

[forest dweller]

Mediocre idea, at best. I learned a long time ago that if I have to convince someone to join me, I'll probably have more fun by myself.

You can upgrade it to a full-on terrible idea by jumping straight into a week long, deep wilderness trip right off the bat.

Personally, my wife loves getting outdoors - she occasionally joins me for 2-3 day weekend trips or even 20+ mile day hikes - but she has zero interest in longer trips. I'm sure glad I let her figure that out at the tail end of a short trip, rather than the middle of a long one.

You're probably right. If we go together, and we go for 2 weeks, probably have to do a few 2 to 4 night trips inside Yellowstone with motel breaks. Slough Creek / Lamar Valley / Hellroaring area perhaps.

One thing I have to make clear though...my wife is a nervous type...she often needs to be convinced of something and then afterwards she is glad she was...that's with a lot of things. She'll hate music I listen to...until she loves it herself!

We have done 5 day trips in the Adirondacks together, and as I said, she has enjoyed them providing distances are reasonable, pack weight is reasonable, the bugs aren't exceptionally bad and the weather is mostly good. But hell, I probably just described most people!

 

[Rockskipper]

If you're planning on going to Yellowstone and staying even one night in a campground, you're probably too late for reservations. I checked them yesterday and everything's booking really fast. There were a few nights available in August. If they have a quota on permits (never backpacked there), you might want to get it set up asap.

 

[Bob]

Suggestion for a backpacking....

Start at the east entrance road TH.... Go south around yellowstone lake, end at heart lake trail head. Easy 50 mile, all trail, elevation gain/loss is about 600 ft. You get a decent trail, lake view, meadows, creeks, bears, wolves, geysers. Have to do a car shuttle though.

 

[forest dweller]

Suggestion for a backpacking....

Start at the east entrance road TH.... Go south around yellowstone lake, end at heart lake trail head. Easy 50 mile, all trail, elevation gain/loss is about 600 ft. You get a decent trail, lake view, meadows, creeks, bears, wolves, geysers. Have to do a car shuttle though.

Thanks for that tip, I really appreciate it. That's the general area I'd like to see but
* we'll have one rental car and would have to figure out how to get back to it if we do a through hike
* the goal is the Thorofare and assorted valleys / creeks flowing into Yellowstone River
* I'd like to take a route that gets us back in there the fastest and is the most scenic doing it
* currently have my eyes on the Ishawooa area or maybe Eagle Creek

 

[forest dweller]

If you're planning on going to Yellowstone and staying even one night in a campground, you're probably too late for reservations. I checked them yesterday and everything's booking really fast. There were a few nights available in August. If they have a quota on permits (never backpacked there), you might want to get it set up asap.

Thanks for the heads up.
Most of what I want to do is backcountry. I imagine there will be backcountry campsites available up until the last minute of going, especially if I have to switch to the national forests / wilderness areas adjoining the park itself...which is currently the plan anyway. Days / nights in between probably staying in motels in Cody.

 

[The Trout Whisperer]

The simplest answer is sometimes the easiest.....get out on th trails closest to ya and find some people...this has worked for me on a few occasions. Just get out there..

 

[Yvonne]

Thanks for that tip, I really appreciate it. That's the general area I'd like to see but
* we'll have one rental car and would have to figure out how to get back to it if we do a through hike

I just read this about this company. They finally allow taxi services inside Yellowstone. This will ease up trips for solo hikers like me and would also help you with a single car.
I haven't tried them yet but are considering it for some of my long solo hikes this summer

Yellowstone Taxi

Yellowstone Taxi operates Yellowstone National Park taxi service, with Yellowstone taxi service in Yellowstone, and West Yellowstone taxi services.

yellowstonetaxi.com

 

[Jorey]

As a 30s New Yorker with similar problems, and who used to feel quite similarly (read: pretentious) about the Cats and the ADK vs the West. I think the recommendation to just get outside is the one most spot on. Yes, those areas will never be as loud as the Intermountain West, but damn if every time I get my ass on the trail I don't feel much better than if I didn't, regardless of where I am.

I would echo others on the guided trips. While I haven't done one, I submitted for a Skurka trip with the primary reason of trying to meet others with similar interests, goals, and outlook. Frankly I think what he charges is quite reasonable.

As far as convincing your spouse goes, I would echo again others who have recommended against it unless you know they like it. Find out what they enjoy, convey what you do, and then compromise, leaning towards their needs. Do everything in your power to make sure they will have a good time. Then, when you get out there and one of you is not having a good time, change the plan. Alan Dixon has a great post about this on one of the backpacking forums, I'll see if I can find it. Reading it helped me realize how I had been a bad partner previous, and how I could be much better.

And if you are successful and have a good time, practice some gratitude that you have a spouse that is willing to spend their vacation pooping and sweating in the woods with you for any amount of time. [emoji4]

Generally though, it sounds like you are relatively unwilling to compromise on what you want, which is okay...if you are willing to go alone. Going with others means relationships, and relationships usually mean compromise. Figuring out how to enjoy it alone is clearly the straightest line towards your longer itineraries, and conveniently the one you have the most control over.

Hope you get out there!

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[forest dweller]

As a 30s New Yorker with similar problems, and who used to feel quite similarly (read: pretentious) about the Cats and the ADK vs the West. I think the recommendation to just get outside is the one most spot on. Yes, those areas will never be as loud as the Intermountain West, but damn if every time I get my ass on the trail I don't feel much better than if I didn't, regardless of where I am.

I would echo others on the guided trips. While I haven't done one, I submitted for a Skurka trip with the primary reason of trying to meet others with similar interests, goals, and outlook. Frankly I think what he charges is quite reasonable.

As far as convincing your spouse goes, I would echo again others who have recommended against it unless you know they like it. Find out what they enjoy, convey what you do, and then compromise, leaning towards their needs. Do everything in your power to make sure they will have a good time. Then, when you get out there and one of you is not having a good time, change the plan. Alan Dixon has a great post about this on one of the backpacking forums, I'll see if I can find it. Reading it helped me realize how I had been a bad partner previous, and how I could be much better.

And if you are successful and have a good time, practice some gratitude that you have a spouse that is willing to spend their vacation pooping and sweating in the woods with you for any amount of time. [emoji4]

Generally though, it sounds like you are relatively unwilling to compromise on what you want, which is okay...if you are willing to go alone. Going with others means relationships, and relationships usually mean compromise. Figuring out how to enjoy it alone is clearly the straightest line towards your longer itineraries, and conveniently the one you have the most control over.

Hope you get out there!

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I don't think you entirely understood me and then filled in some blanks.
I love the Adirondacks. The Catskills are alright....but I'm not a big fan of Harriman and Fahnestock and other places you can't seem to get too far from a road. For hiking and exercise they are OK....for backpacking not so much.
The primary reason I'd go on a guided trip is for companionship...and that's a lot of money to spend to just be with people...considering, if I were just luckier, I'd have met more backpackers and have more backpacking friends.
My wife appreciates being in beautiful places but like anyone else wants to be comfortable. Sometimes we've had to push on further to get to a campsite in places that are strict about where you camp (Banff). Sometimes the choice (if available) is to camp as soon as 5 miles in or go on to the next campsite at 12 miles. I've made the mistake of trying to get a little further with her and I learned from it. In that situation I'd probably have to try to see less and not skip over any campsites, providing they are available.
I guess if I'm being entirely honest I'd like to go with her...and I'd like to go with people super motivated about it, and if I could not find the latter and my wife seemed to be on the fence about it I'd try to convince her to go. But there are so many things that she seems wishy washy about and after being persuaded she is happy that she was.
But a concern of mine for this summer is if I can take her to a very beautiful and remote area that she'd love I'd want her to be safe if something happened to me...I wish they had paired up couples backpacking...and I don't mean paying 4 Grand for it!

 

[Jorey]

The primary reason I'd go on a guided trip is for companionship...and that's a lot of money to spend to just be with people...considering, if I were just luckier, I'd have met more backpackers and have more backpacking friends.

Everything has a cost. If you make friends that you then continue doing non guided trips from there, is it worth it? Luck and your wife you can't control. Going on a trip you can. Sounds like this is very important to you, and you have a lot to consider. Wish you well.



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